The only book I’ve ever TRULY wanted to publish was this great work of art. Someone else did it: the late great Peter Workman of Workman Publishing. I kept that book on my bedside table for many years, finally deciding “I’ve Been Weaned!” was the funniest cartoon. I like to throw my arms over my head and shout “I’ve Been Weaned!” when I get out of long boring containments. Not prison but close.

The closest I ever got to publishing Bad Cat was this:


Of course it wasn’t as funny. How could it have been? It’s hard to catch them doing shit when you’re at work. Without forensics, you just can’t be sure of what changed the color of the fabric on the far end of your couch. Sometimes when I come home after a long day, I take a deep inhale and think “they’ve been in here, doing shit.” Intuition screamed. I’d check the room. I’d sniff some more. I’d wash. I’d repair. And I would continue to love beyond all reason, my cats, living and dead.

If you haven’t read Bad Cat, do so now. What Pets Do While You’re at Work can be the second title on this reading list. But really, BAD. CAT.

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